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5.23.2011

Heartfelt Confessions

They're beautiful.  They're also a bitch.  Although, inexplicably, you feel a lot better once you've gotten them off your chest.  Here I go.

Lately, I've been doing a lot of thinking.  Trying to sort out some weird feelings I've been having.  Even though they're my feelings, I really can't make as much sense of them as I'd like to.  But here's what I've figured out:

To me, what I seek in relationships isn't so much a physical connection as an emotional one.  Someone I can spill all my secrets to, not just make out with.  Lately, I've been noticing a certain person about once a day around 10:12 in the morning.  At first it was recognition, but now it's become what I guess you might call attraction.  Not completely romantic attraction, but the other definition too.  A feeling of being drawn toward something.  Or someone.  

This certain attractive person happens to be a girl as well.  

This is where it gets complicated.  It seems I find myself "attracted" (again, in the drawn to sense not the romantic sense) to a different people all the time, and I really can't explain why.  It's so strange I can't even come up with a good metaphor for it.

Maybe this will be explained soon.  Maybe not.  All I know is it's probably just a phase, or hormones, or something.

Most likely no one will ever read this, much less anybody who knows me.  But it just feels good to feel like I'm telling someone.  Sometimes just talking to a wall that won't say anything back or think differently about you is just what you need.  



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